Believing my heart broken I call out to He who formed it.

It seems we are all just wandering souls, holding our broken parts, pretending that they're whole.
Only delicate shells.
Showing a mask of a smile instead of the pain living just beyond our empty eyes.
Holding back tears and ignoring the pain we wander on, playing our part in this masquerade.

Lord, tear away this veil and let me cry.
I want to be free and full of joy.

One Dream

I dreamed we were one, instead of two parts. Only one soul and only one mind.
With two eyes to look out onto the world, and a constant stream of thoughts to share.
Together we held no secrets, but all was know and all was loved.
The good the bad and the in-between.

We were whole, and this was all we needed.

Overcast.

Where is the beauty? All hidden inside by a fright filled smile, with eyes that lied of a brighter tomorrow, and a light filled today.
A future of sun,
but with thoughts in the way.

Looking for my Twilight.

I saw you today, in the shadow of some other man.
He held your essence as he walked by,
smoking his last cigarette.
He walked with your body and then he was gone,
taking with him your dream. I held so tight,
too tightly in the dream that I dreamed in the light.

But there is no day,
now there's only night.
Only darkness that tears.
Not even Twilight.

Nor even an echo of your whispered words,
spoken in silence, so never heard
except by my heart.
Translating the lies that you fed me to hopes,
and dreams,
and lullabies,
that rocked me to sleep.

To be with you so I could be.

But there is no day.
I am left in this night.
No escape from this darkness,
not even Twilight.

A million tears may make an ocean.

I want to love as an ocean. Deep and overwhelming, frightful in all it’s beautiful raging,

Out of control and breathtaking.

I want to soar with this love to new places. On adventures ever so exciting. Flying towards some end unknown and yet daring to go. I only want to hold with all that I am and allow myself to be carried away by the wind and the water and some hope in the air. I want to feel my love’s breathe on my body and know that I am safe in that moment.

A moment that lasts forever.

I want to love with out one care.

To love with abandon and let my life be pushed by this. To forget the woes of yesterday and embrace all that I hold in today. Finding my way to a new life, guided by my heart and all the feeling that I hold inside.

Let me love as an ocean.

About life.

Why is it so easy to forget all of this?
All of this amazing, impossible love?
All of this grace?

I feel as if I live in a world that is truly fake.
Blinding me,
tying me,
pulling heavy darkness in front of my eyes.
As if this love wasn't important enough.

As if it wasn't breathing life into my soul's very essence.

There is nothing so life changing,
life overtaking,
than the moment of meeting one's Saviour.
My Truest Love.
The Only One.
The reason my heart is now beating.

More than enough.

Of a memory

Sometimes I feel as if I could lose myself in remembering.

I forget to live for all the recalling.

Even all of the present pondering.

There is a silent conversation within myself,

Continuing quietly,

Forever silent.

Neverending.

I live not in this now, but in the next

Or quite usually,

The last.

Holding on to a fleeting love.

A moment that so passed like the one before,

And the one before,

And the one before that.

Because my human heart seems to be made of glass.

Translucent, and delicate, and

ever so breakable.

And my mind holds on as if it can never let go.

The picture of perfect rejection.

Immortal.

Holding hidden quiet secrets I am bursting from within.

Devastatingly lost: you were.
You seemed, and seem
to me.
I still find my heart holding your secrets.
A heart overflowing with exquisite worry.

These painful to remember dreams.

Ask me to hold your thoughts for you,
my heart screams quiet within me.
I'll see your smile in all that I do.
I searched,
am searching,
to find your truth.

Pretty,
you'd see me holding your secrets.
I'd close my mouth against yours
so lovely,
and keep your secrets,
never rid of.
If broken,
and breaking,
you hadn't left me.

See it everywhere.

I see beauty all around me.
Laughing and smiling
and simple.
Pure joy. Pure truth.
Standing unabashed and ever natural.

I always prayed to be beautiful.
Craved it,
chased it,
begged it to stay.
I didn't even know it was with me all along.
In the moments and persons I least expected it from.
Because
beauty exists in The Most Unusual Places

The Most Obscure Pieces.

In the corners of eyes and deep laugh lines
and in all smiles.

It is waiting for your existence to allow it's inevitable life.

The pen hits the page.

I am one hundred thousand streams.
Of thoughts,
Of tears,
Of smiles,
Of feelings.
And so the rivers flow and flood this page, soaked with my silent thoughts and
ponderings.

Held quietly inside they were dangerously undescribed,
but
rid of all imaginings I'm free to finally fly.
So I let my own words open my heart
and watch as all my thoughts pour forth.
And I am left drenched in uncertainty,
wondering if you heard me like I wished you'd heard me.
Seeing you breathe it all in slowly, tasting each syllable on your
tongue.

Now I am found the vulnerable one.

Watch me.